Let's play a game... it's called
Name!
That!
Ailment! (yaaaaaaaaaaayy!!)
Since earlier this week I've had a strange tender and painful spot on the backside of my left hand. It's about 2 inches by 1 inch, just behind my pointer finger knuckle. It hurt like a bruise but there was no mark.
I've had no trauma or strain that I can remember. No one hit me and I didn't punch anyone. First it was just tender and painful when touched but yesterday a bruise and an indentation popped up and it feels more like a bump than a strain. It feels like a bump but there's no external swelling.
So, what's the ailment?
A. I have cancer and I'm totally going to die but no one will do a documentary on my brave struggle a la Farrah Fawcett because I'm not famous.
B. I've been sleep walking to my local Fight Club meeting unbeknowst to me (this might also explain the other random mystery bruises elsewhere).
C. It's nothing, just one of those things.
What thinks you?
11 comments:
Are we supposed to guess what it is? I'm guessing polar bear in a snowstorm.
Are you left-handed perchance? Is this behind your mouse clicking finger? Could it be some type of ergonomic injury?
Otherwise I'm all in on the Fight Club theory.
@lazybuddhist - nope, not left handed so maybe it is option B but you know, I'm not supposed to talk about it.
Well I really hope it's not A! And C is far too mundane ... so I'm gonna go with B! That would be totally badass!
Oh, well, in that case my earlier guess doesn't make much sense. Not that my comments ever do.
Did something bite you? Doesn't sound likely. I'm guessing you just smacked it against something and didn't realize it.
Or, you know, Fight Club. But I don't want to talk about that.
SPIDER BITE!!! EEEK!
small alien?
I'm going with the sassy britches. something bit you.
It's probably cancer.
Nah. I'd say that it's either contact dermatitis or the dreaded "just sleeping on it in a weird way."
Obviously you need to see your Employee Health Services, which makes it an OSHA reportable, and have a repeat ergonomic assessment, at which point you will be prescribed an expensive chair with custom gel elbow areas and a brace to wear. You need to visit the athletic trainer for your site who will poke at you and print out stretch instructions specific to your ailment. Also you must install ergonomic software which forces you to take micropauses and then longer breaks periodically, during which you will be shown stretches to perform, and the breaks will be calculated as you work (more breaks will pop up if you work more intensely). This software will count your mouseclicks and keystrokes and chart all of it and put an angry face in your systray if you don't obey. And your boss will check your obedience during safety walkthroughs. And I'm NOT making any of this up: it's my actual experience at my current job!
A bump on the back of your hand? It might be a cyst. I had one and had it had the doc remove it, tho they do go away on their own sometimes! Depends on where it is at on your hand, because if it is situation over a tendon it can cause discomfort, etc. Hope you got it figured out! I always say wait a week or two - but that has landed me in the ER - tho only once. ;)
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